Special Needs Siblings are Resilient

Posted: 5 years ago

Special Needs Siblings are Resilient

Resilience training. It’s a class my daughter frequents because she has a sibling with special needs.

She was so excited to start dance and couldn’t wait for her second dance class. I tried everything I could to rearrange appointments so she didn’t have to miss, but came up short. I explained it to her and she knew the drill: she had to go to her brother’s doctor appointment and we’d do our best to make it to dance.

Once we got back to the exam room, we changed her clothes, hoping we’d make it on time. We rushed out and made it with half of the class time left. I could have been swallowed up by mom guilt, but instead, I was reminded of the advantage she has as a sister of a sibling with special needs—she is trained in resilience.

I know she’s only 5, but I also know it’s not too early. She understands she and her siblings take turns at center stage. That day, it was her brother who took the top billing. She understands that because he has a disability, he has more time in the spotlight.

And that’s life. Sometimes we have to roll in the direction it tilts. If we fight back at every setback, we just get worn out. Instead, we adjust, adapt and make the best out of the new situation.

One day life will throw her a curve ball, and she will be able to hit it farther than most because she is well trained in resilience.

So, don’t pity this tiny dancer with the brother with special needs, instead, pull up a chair and learn from her. I know I am.

Jillian Benfield

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